Be happy and stay happy.

“We tend to forget that happiness doesn't come as a result of getting something we don't have, but rather of recognizing and appreciating what we do have.”
Frederick Keonig

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

Are Negative Emotions Getting You Sick - By Bo Sanchez

Germs. We blame them for our sickness. But that’s only partly true. Our immune system is so terrific, it can fight almost all germs. But we get into trouble when our immune system gets weak. And one thing that causes it to weaken is our negative emotions.

The Shocking Truth

This blew my mind. Studies show that 85% of all disease is rooted in our emotions. Wow.

That means that among the 17 million people who died of heart disease last year, and among the 7.2 million people who died of cancer last year, 85% of those diseases were rooted in their emotions.

Man! If only someone taught them to work on their emotions (not just on their bodies), some of them might still be alive today.

Here’s what I believe. Most of our diseases are messages. What message? Diseases are telling us that we have a spiritual need that we need to fill.

But instead of listening to the message, we kill the messenger. We get rid of the sickness without addressing our soul needs. Very soon, the sickness will reappear. Sometimes, in a fatal way.

For example, our sickness may be telling us, “You need to forgive and get rid of your anger,” but instead of forgiving, we take a pill. Or our sickness is telling us, “You need to stop worrying and trust God more,” but instead of trusting, we take a pill. Or our sickness is telling us, “You need to stop working too hard and relax more with your family,” but instead of playing with our kids, we take a pill.

In primitive societies, doctors were also priests. When people got sick, the cure was holistic. Aside from giving them herbs, doctors told them to pray, to forgive, to trust in God.

And then the scientific revolution came, and doctors focused purely on the body. Today, the old model is coming back.

Because now, my friend doctors are praying with their patients, are telling them to have faith, to forgive, and to spend time with their families. They’ve become doctors and priests again.

Two Reasons Why We Get Sick

How do our emotions cause sickness?

In two important ways. First, when we have too much negative emotions. Second, when we have too little positive emotions. Let me tell you how both are deadly to your system.

1. Too Much Negative Emotions

Let’s take stress.

When I was a small boy, I regularly massaged Dad’s shoulders every night. Part of my “chore” as a kid.

But everytime I did, I’d complain.

Because his shoulders were as hard as steel! They were no match for my tiny thumbs.

Even then, I knew the tension in his shoulders came from his job. Dad was a manager in a large food company.

Mom said he also had hypertension. As Filipinos love to say, “mataas ang high blood niya”. (Wow, that’s really high.)

Dad had hypertension all his life.

All his life, that is, until he reached 65. That was the year he retired from his job. From that day on, he never had hypertension, all the way until the day God called him home at young age of 88.

One day, when Dad was already retired—but very busy serving God—I remember he was eating in the dining room. I went behind him and gave him a shoulder massage.

The difference was amazing! His shoulders were soft and supple. No more tension in them.

That’s the power of stress in our lives.

Let me ask you a question: How stressed are you?

Stress And Sickness

Who are those most susceptible to heart disease?

Those with a “Type A Personality”: People who are aggressive, easily angered, competitive, controlling, and always rushing.

Here’s a scary fact. 82% of people who have heart disease have a Type A Personality! Why? Stress. (Type A Personality isn’t just a personality. Type A is a spiritual disease.)

Here’s another fact: More strokes and heart attacks happen on Monday than at another day of the week. (We need a Presidential Decree removing Mondays from our calendar!)

I know a woman who liked her job but didn’t like the boss she was working for. There was a lot of conflict. Wanting a break from her stress, she took a 15-day vacation. And she enjoyed her two-week vacation. But on the 14th day, when she knew she was going back to her job, she suffered a massive stroke. Today, half of her body is paralyzed.

Which was a perfect picture of her life—half of her body wanted to go to work, the other half didn’t want to!

Because our bodies were not made for prolonged stress.

Another negative emotion is anger…

Anger Has An Expiry Date

One day, a man was sitting in his living room when he heard a knock on the front door.

He opened the door and saw no one. But as he looked down, he saw a snail, saying in a little voice, “Can I borrow P100?”

The man shouted, “Get outta here!” and kicked the snail off his porch.

One year later, the man is sitting in the living room and he hears a knock on the door.

He opens it and sees a very angry snail, asking, “Why did you do that?”

Some of us are snails.

After a year, we’re still angry!

People who are like snails won’t enjoy optimal health.

Here’s the truth: God never designed your body to keep anger for a long time. Anger’s purpose is to spur you to action. Once that purpose is fulfilled, you should get rid of anger by forgiveness.

In other words, anger has an expiry date. Once past is due, it becomes poison in your body.

Are you angry with someone?

Surrender your anger to God.

Angry People Die Sooner

They made a study of 255 doctors and asked them to take a “hostility” test.

In other words, how they respond to drivers who cut them on the road. Or to people who criticize them. Or to friends who are disloyal them.

Thirty years later, the researchers went back to these same doctors. What did they find out? Some of those doctors who scored high in the hostility test were already dead! Their death rate was six times higher than those who scored low in the hostility test. Remember: Angry people die sooner.

Don’t Escape!

If we don’t want to get sick, what should we do with stress, anger, sadness, fear, and other negative emotions? Ignore them? Pretend they’re not there? Nope. That will make it worse.

Here’s my big message for you: What you can feel, you can heal. What does that mean? Don’t escape your negative emotions. Perhaps you have money problems now. Or you have conflicts at work. Or you have a broken heart. Or you have marriage problems. Or you have problems with your kids. Or you’re sick right now. And you’re tempted to escape from your anxiety, stress, anger, fear, and depression.

How? Some people become numb.

Others escape through addictions: drugs, alcohol, sex, video games, food, shopping, relationships, and workaholism. Remember that all addiction is really emotional anesthesia. So we won’t feel our emptiness, our fears, our depression, our anger, we distract ourselves.

But when we don’t feel our negative emotions, they come out in our bodies as respiratory problems, ulcers, headaches, skin allergies, digestive problems, even cancers.

Feel Your Feelings Before God

If you want to be healed from your diseases, feel your negative emotions. More specifically, feel your darkest emotions before God. Weep. Be angry. Question Him. (Believe me, He’s big enough to take it.)

Go to God now. And share your inmost heart. Tell Him what you feel, whether it’s anxiety, stress, fear, anger, sadness…

The Psalms of the Bible are exactly like this! They contain what I call “terrible” prayers.

For example, Psalms 22 says, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? O my God, I cry out by day, but you do not answer…”

And in Psalms 55, it says, “My heart is in anguish within me; the terrors of death assail me. Fear and trembling have beset me; horror has overwhelmed me.

But that’s precisely why they’re in the Bible. God is telling you to go to Him no matter what you’re feeling. Friend, God is waiting for you now. So go ahead. Before Him, feel your darkest emotions. Soon, those negative emotions will pass. Because all storms come to an end. And you’ll notice the healing of your body too. And here’s the second reason…

2.Too Little Positive Emotions

Two weeks ago, I met Fr. Georges-Etienne Beauregard—an old Jesuit priest.

His age? 97 years old.

He’s led an incredible life: Imprisoned in China, built churches in the Philippines for 12 years, and worked with the aborigines in Taiwan for the last 42 years.

What is he doing today at 97? Still very busy, working in a parish and hospital (which he also built) among the aborigines in Taiwan.

How healthy is he? When he was 95, he was still riding his motorbike!

I asked him, “Father, what is the secret of your long life?”

He chuckled and said, “I have no problems. Others have problems with me, but I have no problems.”

In other words, he didn’t focus on his problems.

In my short time I had with him, I noticed he chuckled a lot. He loved to laugh!

The secret to his long life was no secret at all. It was very obvious. He had a light, jolly heart.

Your Need For Joy

Your body was made to operate with the “oil of gladness” flowing through your veins, tissues, and cells. You were made to laugh, to celebrate, to be happy!

One day, Norman Cousins was diagnosed to have heart disease. In his book, The Anatomy of An Illness, he shares how he got healed: By taking Vitamin C and mega-doses of laughter. Everyday, he would watch comedy films and enjoy 10 minutes of genuine belly laughter. And he was healed! Doctors thought he would live a short life. But he lived for 30 more years.

That’s why the Bible says, A happy heart is good medicine and a cheerful mind works healing, but a broken spirit dries up the bones (Proverbs 17:22).

Are you a happy person? Do you enjoy life? Are you fulfilled? Are you self-assured? Many studies show that positive emotions strengthen your immune system.

Optimists Live Longer!

Scientists studied 1,100 patients at the Mayo Clinic and asked them to do a personality survey. These studies classified them according to optimists and pessimists. Thirty years later, they went back to these patients.

Here’s what they found out: Optimists have a 19% higher chance of still being alive than the pessimists.

Here’s one fascinating explanation.

In one study, scientists studied one of the body’s natural “good mood chemicals” called serotonin.

When they placed serotonin in a test tube alongside tumor cells of Burkitt’s lymphoma, the cancer cells kill themselves.

Here’s a quote from that study: “An exciting property of serotonin is that it can tell some cells to self-destruct. We have found serotonin can get inside the lymphoma cells and instruct them to commit suicide.”

How To Have More Positive Emotions

How can you be happy more often? How can you have more content, self-assurance, fulfillment, and a deep sense of profound peace more often? Let me end this discussion by showing you two ways:

First, Gratitude

Maricel is our house helper.

She shared to me a very touching story.

Last month, she went home to her province in Dumaguete. She borrowed money from us to buy the little plot of land that her family house was standing on. She also brought home her savings, buying a sack of rice for her family.

She also went home to spend time with her siblings and their children—her little nephews and nieces. So one bright morning, from the barrio, they travelled to Dumaguete City. Maricel paid for all their jeepney fares.

Everyone was excited, she said. Because for some of them, it was the first time to visit the city.

She brought her family to a mall—and the kids were beside themselves with joy.

What they loved most was the escalators. They shrieked with delight, “Ate, yung hagdan, tumatakbo!” (The stairs are running!)

When they went home, everyone was so happy.

One of her little nieces hugged Maricel and asked, “Tita, sa susunod na taon, ipasyal mo kami ulit, ha?” (Auntie, bring us out next year, okay?) Clearly, it was the high point of their year.

Casually, I asked Maricel, “What did you eat in the mall?”

“Hindi po kami kumain, Kuya Bo. Walang budget, eh.” (We didn’t eat. I had no budget.)

Her answer brought me to tears. Those kids went to the mall and went home without eating, and yet they were so happy.

Sometimes, I forget how blessed I am.

Sometimes, we have food in front of us, and we even have the gall to complain that it isn’t our favorite.

No wonder we lack happiness in our lives.

And no wonder our bodies are sick!

Learn to be more grateful for life. Live in gratitude. Celebrate God’s goodness, even in the smallest blessings!

Soon, happiness and healing will flow into your life.

Second, Trust

Heart disease has killed more people than any other disease in the world. It’s the number one killer in the world.

And I believe the number one cause of heart disease is stress.

From my experience, there’s only one antidote to stress: Trust in God. It’s the greatest stress-buster in the world.

How much do you trust in God?

A deep trust in God will make you avoid stress and keep you healthy!

I invite you now to surrender your problems to God. Follow the Bible when it says, Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. (1 Peter 5:7)

He does care for you, my friend.

Give Him all your fears.

Surrender yourself to God.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

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